The Unmiraculous Mornings of Life With Chronic Illness

Miracle mornings?

Uh, any morning is a miracle if I make it through without getting sick.

Because of that, I only made it a few chapters into The Miracle Morning before I had to stop. The risk of throwing and breaking my Kindle was too high.

One-size-fits-all routines—for ANY time of day—are never the answer, no matter how neatly they can be wrapped up in an easy-to-read acronym.

Especially when they only take into account one type of person, and that type of person is privileged and abled.

So miraculous mornings...who needs those?

Here's what my "miraculous" wake-up routine looks like:

1. Realize I'm awake.
2. Wonder who I am, where I am, what day it is, what year it is, and whether it's morning or night.
3. Slowly shake my head to see if/how much it hurts.
4. Wiggle my body to see what else hurts and how much.
5. Cautiously sit up a little to see if nausea kicks in.
6. Look at that, it does! Every time.
7. Yell about it to my partner so he can bring me food to take my meds with.
8. Watch Netflix and eat crackers in bed until the Zofran kicks in.

So miraculous, right?

But I've tried to deny this reality, and it's not worth it anymore.